Av’s Hot Takes

Musically & Vine over Tiktok

I remember the days I woke up and grabbed my iPhone 5 to be presented with the cringiest, funniest videos ever. Now I wake up to see a girl vlogging her day and eating a 0-calorie bagel while doing her “doom-of-despair gym workout”. I miss the days I could make fireballs with a filter! But now, all we do is make corny thirst traps and “I hate my boyfriend” videos (I love the “I hate my boyfriend” videos though). You’re telling me singing Boomerang by JoJo Siwa is more cringe than treating the door frame as your Magic Mike show? We could laugh at “Nina, Nina, Nina!” vids for hours—that Vine is still around to this day. I do not believe “baby boo” or “67” is going to be funny in 10 years, or even in 10 minutes.

Cats over dogs

Dogs. they’re loyal, cute, and funny creatures. But do you see them sleeping in positions where they look like they’re contortionists? I look over to my cat, and she looks so broken, but so cute. They don’t need much attention. You don’t have to wake up at 5 a.m. to take them outside, shush them from barking, or smell wet dog. Basically, what I’m saying is cats are for lazy people. That’s me. I love my dog when I take him on a walk outside and snap the fine shyts to make me look productive, or whatever. Other than that, cats are just superior—adorable (in any position, apparently), and will leave you alone until needed. Pretty sick, if you ask me.

Shrek is disturbing

Honestly, I haven’t seen Shrek since I was a kid. Good reason for that, though. I remember how much it weirded me out, especially the gingerbread man. That thing said some freaky things, and I refused to eat gingerbread or even discuss the gingerbread man after I watched Shrek.Now I feel more safe with the topic, but will I ever dare to watch Shrek again? ABSOLUTELY NOT. I will not be 17 years old and hush my grandma when she asks to make gingerbread men for Christmas.